Filed under: mulling over
So I’m sitting in my parent’s basement with a broken foot watching some post-season football. My mind drifts easily from various thoughts that I have been filtering through over the past few weeks and months.
There is nothing quite like a doctor telling you that staying off your broken foot could mean living a normal life for the next 60 years or developing arthritis and compounding the injury. As much as I enjoy being active and running around I’ve decided that taking a few weeks and giving my body a good chance to heal is definitely the smart move. My biggest challenge is in being content to sit and heal while my bills pile up and I might be able to do a little odd job here or there. My responsibilities are not that great but they don’t allow for missing payments or deadlines.
So being alright with being hurt is something that is a little more tough for me. I’m not married and there isn’t an additional income that could help ease the burden of making ends meet. But that is just one of the risks associated with being a single homeowner.
I’ve often found as a Christian that when I have a considerable amount of down time there are some lessons being taught. My time in basic training with the Army is a good example of “down time” in that though I wasn’t laid up as I am now I really only had a few tasks to do every day with plenty of time to think and process all day long. This last year in Nepal I had plenty of down time where I was limited in my activities but was free to absorb life and contemplate each day with more depth than I normally would. Here I am much more severely hampered and not only do I have time to think but I also have time to plan for when the rubber once again meets the road. The rest I’m experiencing now is tempered with the reality that I’m on a financial cliff with not having worked much over the last month plus medical bills and house payments means I’ll be in a tight spot for a few months.
The advantage is that I savor work. I look forward to getting dirt under my fingernails and pulling a few weeks of late nights in order to catch up. This satisfaction I derive from working is definitely absent when I just pop percocet and ibuprofen all day. I must say though that my balance on my right foot has been keenly developed over the past few weeks!
If a source of satisfaction for me is working hard then having a broken foot with 5 fresh screws and a plate holding my ankle together has a great chance of raining on my parade!
One of the lessons God has been instilling in me is in the realm of contentment. No matter where I go or what I do it is comforting to know that I will always have a chance to learn and grow.
A big part of coming to a place of contentment for me is knowing what my role is, understanding who I am and what my current role is. Not focusing on what it could be or maybe should be but on what it currently is. To be able to comfortable with not working I have to be able to see where I am at and after trusting God to work out my needs be alright with letting Him do that and concentrate on what is required of me. Right now it is simply to get better, maybe to reach out to a few people, and spend time considering God and how I can better glorify Him in what I do.
My past plays a big part in my ability to be content. The valleys I have gotten to travel through have been a blessing in that it now takes much more to rattle me than 10 years ago. The credit here also has to go to God, every major forming time in my life (also can be read “major trial or tribulation”) I can distinctly recall a peace and calm that was not from me. This peace didn’t just come with the turf though, I had to get to a breaking point and seek out Christ and the peace followed.
Contentment is an ever-changing condition. It isn’t a place that once you arrive you stay. As life has dramatic twists and changed there are also changes that can take place in contentment. Being content with a a broken foot and medical bills is the same though as being content while in good health and working. The conditions change but your heart’s condition shouldn’t. Just as there is a level of trust that God will provide work the next day when you are healthy so also that trust must be there to allow God to carry you through tougher circumstances.
I guess when you boil it down it really ends at where your heart is and what/who impacts your heart.
I tend to find it easier to be in a state of contentment if I’m busy but I think God wants people that a usable in any condition. If I’m only content and open to God’s call at certain windows then I’m not usable. The greater test for me is in being content and using the free time I have in an effective manner.
My contentment is being tried in another area. It isn’t at all related to my injury or that I’m in a holding pattern until I heal. It is much more complex with more variables that are well beyond my control. The issue of contentment comes in with being alright with God handling these variables. I have high hopes and would be a liar if I said I didn’t care how the chips fall one day but I do care and that is where the test is. It is always easy to trust that God will handle a situation well that you are removed from but when it involves you, even to a minor degree, and there is nothing you can do to sway the outcome in your favor or predict the outcome then the only place peace can be found is in contentment. Being willing and able to accept the outcome, even if it is not as you expected and not how you wanted, is a sure test of growth, maturity, and character.
Hey Guys and Gals,
As many of you may have heard, seen, or even experienced today…New Life Church in Colorado Springs was attacked by a gunman this afternoon after the late morning service.
Several of my friends and I were milling about after the service and I left just seconds before the shooting began. A young girl was killed and her sister is in critical condition and is not looking good. She has wounds to her abdomen and has lost a great deal of blood. The girl’s father and another sister were also shot and are in better condition.
The state of shock is pretty amazing. I haven’t felt like this in a while. I feel perfectly fine but there is a pit in my gut that will likely take some time before it goes away.
Several friends of mine had close encounters with the gunman. One friend’s dad found himself in a hallway with the gunman at one point. He served in Vietnam but was still shaken up pretty hard.
Days like today really make me ask questions that I don’t normally ask myself on a daily basis. Thankfully it is because normally this isn’t an everyday occurrence. At least not in America.
Senseless violence is sickening. I cannot imagine what would possess someone to attack innocent people and take their lives without any reason. Do you have to be a Christian and go to church to think it is senseless? I don’t think so.
After 9-11 America came together and it was incredible to see the support people suddenly had for each other for a while. Flags were flying EVERYWHERE, you couldn’t get away from it. Even though there was a massive loss of life there was a feeling of unity and pride for several months.
The attack today was on a much smaller scale but the same results can, and I hope will, happen.
There is no solid answer to what caused this all to happen. There never seems to be a solid answer when people really want an explanation for why there will be an empty seat at a dinner table and unopened gifts in a few weeks when Christmas rolls around. There is a response though that I believe eclipses just an answer…and in that response an answer can be found.
The response is, I believe, to push back.
Not in the “eye for an eye”…the gunman is dead. So how does a community push back? With armed guards everywhere and tight security? Banning the possession of weapons? Protests and venting to our congressmen to do something?
I believe that all those are easy cop-outs that only skirt the problem and do not address it. What caused the shooting was likely a deep rooted anger that was just taken out on a soft target on a Sunday afternoon.
To say it is a shock that someone could be this angry to me is off…rather it is a surprise to me that we don’t see this more often. Everyone gets angry. Some more than others. I’d wager that there are many more people that are much more upset than this young man was but just are better at suppressing it. We pack away so much junk and hard feelings that it is a wonder more people don’t pop.
Rage is not going to go anywhere if I write a letter to my state representative. It will not fade if we outlaw firearms or make laws tougher. Anger will not leave us all instantly if we rally and protest it. It’s a feeling, an emotion, not an object, country, dictator, or theme park.
If there is a power so strong that it can drive someone to take life then there must be a power that is as strong to counter it.
This power must drive us to daily take a look at our lives and determine how we are going to live that day. Will we lash out at the driver next to us or leave no tip for the waitress that goofed our order just to “teach a lesson”?
Can people just be nice? Can people just lay aside differences and just get along? Can we simple creatures figure out how to summon this drive to overcome the rage that infects so many of us?
I don’t think we can.
And that is why I believe we need help. Every single person on this earth cannot sing enough songs or work at enough soup kitchens to stomp out hate and anger. We are born with it. You cannot just pluck it out like a stray hair or a zit.
Love, and I mean a true love, is the only power strong enough to counter a raging anger. The love that was naturally born into me along with the root of anger can counter that rage…but it cannot overcome it. A war will rage within each of us and will one day destroy us unless there is outside help to overcome.
To overcome can I have another person help me? Maybe…for a time. But they have the same balance in them. The same seeds of love and hate were born into them also. We are all equal.
There has to be external forces that tip the scales. Today’s event cements my belief in these forces even more. This young man’s scales were tipped. No person today could have tipped them back. An external power would have had to push the scales back.
The love that a man name Jesus gave the world when he died and rose 2000 years ago is that countering force. An awareness of what God thinks of YOU and his love for YOU are the only things that at the end of your days will keep you sane. What is there to live for if you only live a life that will snuff out into nothingness?
If I believe in Jesus Christ and accept him as MY help…then he said he would give me the power to overcome. He would provide for MY needs in all things. The amazing thing about salvation is that Christ died for everyone…even those that curse Christ and refuse to listen to reason.
When Christ came it was to push back the ruling powers in the world. To re-establish the scales…heck, he got rid of the scale and put a brand new one in place! Satan ruled the world from the Fall to when Christ rose from the dead. The historical evidence supporting the life, death, and resurrection of Christ is the soundest argument for any case in history.
If Christ came and died so we can have a new life and overcome this world then that includes the root of anger that festers in the pits of our souls.
Loving each other is not easy. I doubt that it is really even possible to love everyone you ever meet unless you have a power that is outside of your being helping you do so.
What would this planet be like if people could accept the idea that they were created by God and that he loves them? And then live out each day with that idea at the forefront of their minds?
For those of you who do believe this then I think the response to this shooting and other acts of mindless violence that plague us has to be a tremendous outpouring of a love that is not normal. To seek God harder than ever, realize how desperate the times are, and humbly ask for a greater portion of love for people. Then, when God pours that love into you and I we push back against the desires and forces at work in ourselves and others with a love that will not be described.
Pushing back in this way is not easy. But it is possible. Seek and you WILL find.
I have been back in America for a number of weeks now and have scrounged around looking for work that I am qualified for.
My hope was to get to work quickly and head back to Nepal around the beginning of December to attend a friend’s wedding. After a few weeks of hearing a lot of “we are sorry” it became clear that the return trip would have to be postponed for now. After my 3rd week back I took a job in a place I didn’t quite expect to end up working.
A few friends of mine work at a facility for troubled youth. Boys and girls that are at the end of their rope can end up at this treatment center. I have never worked with treatment kids but figured if I could handle the Army and Nepal then I should be able to take whatever these kids could dish out.
It has been about a month since I started and it has been quite a ride at work. The boys and girls live on separate facilities but join up for school during the week. My job is to supervise boys after they have finished with school for the day. I help with any homework that they want help with, take them out to play football or basketball, talk to them, encourage healthy behavior, and if needed break up fights. My job is to keep the boys as safe as I can and not play favorites. They are all there for treatment and I’m simply to make that as easy, and safe, as possible.
Now I’m a thinker when it comes to working with people. I tend to analyze people and try to think of ways to make things run smoothly. If I can understand personalities and how they react to various degrees of stress and circumstances I feel better able to make preemptive decisions to keep the environment as safe as possible. If I can get a kid who’s temper is beginning to flare to take a few minutes to collect his thought out on the deck before he punches another kid out of frustration I have done well. It is not always easy to read these boys. When they are angry it is easy to read but that is often when it is too late. It is when they are calm that their attention can be more easily diverted to keep them focused on good things.
So being that I am wanting to get an idea quickly about who has what sort of personality I have really tried to make myself available for the boys to be able to talk to about anything. I help with homework to a degree and take boys on hikes into the Colorado rocky mountains. Almost anything that will help build up a level of trust and allow them to feel comfortable enough to let their guard down so I can figure out what makes them tick.
In listening to a number of group discussion the boys have on a daily basis and interacting with them for about a month now I have found something that is almost as powerful (likely more powerful) as any technique I have been trained to use. The power of peer pressure.
Peer pressure to me when I was growing up was the influence of others on me or others. I don’t think I remember it being used in any other context than a negative situation where one peer was pressuring another to make a choice that would bring harm to himself, others, or property. I don’t think I had ever though of what it can be used for to influence people to make good decisions.
Working with these boys has brought this subject of peer pressure up and it is something I get to see every time I work at the center. I have seen both sides of it also where a boy influences another to do wrong and also to do something good.
Now this can be done on a one on one level or it can be done by a group influencing an individual or a situation. To be a peer you don’t even have to know the person you are influencing. I have seen a new boy enter into the treatment center and within an hour he has influence several boys to act out and the next day is encouraging them to follow the rules and behave correctly. As long as one breathes that person can influence others.
Now peer pressure does not always work either. Sometimes the influence you have will backfire. A boy that is known to be a bully will have a harder time convincing another that he wants him to do something good than a boy that has been a friend. I would be like being robbed by your neighbors and then them inviting you over for dinner the next day, a normal rational person would be very hesitant to trust that neighbor.
In another way that same bully might notice one of the kids has been upset and cranky and encourage him to act out. Even though it is the same bully that the kid knows will push him around in an hour I’ve seen several times where the bully’s influence will help push another to act out. Your influence and reputation will be a factor in how people respond to you. If I have a reputation of stealing then it will be hard to convince a boss to let me take inventory of the warehouse stock by myself. If my reputation is that I make wise choices investing my money then my input will have more sway when talking to a friend that is falling deeper into debt.
I’ve even begun to try to hone peer pressure “skills” among boys that are leaders and are good examples for other to mimic. If a situation is getting escalated I have several times seen a “leader” sitting somewhere in the room watching what was going on. When asked what his thoughts were the normal reaction is “I cannot believe they are doing this, it is stupid and they are just going to get in trouble.” If I can convince that leader to speak up when the escalation first began and say those exact words the problem is often quickly defused and everyone is fine. This does a number of things for the boys.
The first is what it does to the leader. He will begin to understand what it means to have influence. That he can make a difference and help people to make good choices. This is empowering and encouraging for a boy in residential treatment.
Secondly there are the boys who were getting escalated. I think many people don’t realize that they are getting defensive or upset until it is too late. A defense is a natural reaction to something offensive for most of us. We put up our guard, stiffen up, begin to listen more intently for verbal cues, our blood pressure can go up, fists and jaws clench, all natural reactions to some sort of offense. By having another peer step in and say something like “hey, this is silly and not worth fighting over” boundaries are built in their minds. They begin to process and think rather than just react. They will then think to themselves “is this something silly and not worth fighting over?” and it will help build up a sense of right and wrong in the boys.
Lastly there are the other boys nearby that may have seen or heard the problem escalating. They hear the leader and see the reaction and they get to process the same things like ”was that worth fighting over” and make conclusions of their own.
It is amazing how much power is in what we say. To be able to influence someone to do or not do something is not something to be taken lightly. I’ll keep trying to find ways to convince the boys of that and keep chewing on it myself.
Filed under: things I'm processing still
I’ve been watching Zion continue to grow like a weed these last few weeks. The boy is working on more teeth coming in even though he has got quite a few chompers already. He isn’t too fussy about things but when he has had enough he definitely lets you know about it!
He is learning words quickly. He has names for everyone and can utter an amazing array of sylables that sound somewhat familiar. He is growing up!
Seeing some of the pain he experiences while his body grows like a dandilion in a bag of miracle grow makes me think of my own “growing pains.”
These past few weeks have gotten progressively harder for me. Its like new teeth in a way I guess. It will be over at some point and I will be alright then…but until then it is going to hurt.
My pain is caused by my perception and the ensuing thoughts and emotions I deal with. Many nights a week I wrestle with issues that have been growing for what seems like forever. Things are just not right. And just as Zion knows he is in pain but doesn’t know what it is from so I also feel a pressure and pain but cannot quite put my finger on exactly what it is.
These past few months of living in Nepal has been an honest stretch for me. How I view people both in another culture and my own culture. I’m reminded often about the power of words. That my actions speak louder than even powerful words. That my heart’s condition will spill out regardless of what I do. Its the internal things that really matter.
Some of the pains I’m wrestling through have to do with doing the right thing at all times. I’d say that I’m pretty good at doing the right thing most of the time but its quite a tricky feat to do it at all times…particularly when you feel like something is not quite right or that you have gotten the short end of the stick.
I’ve been told I have insight into people and situations on numerous occasions. The personality tests I took as part of my pre-Nepal training exposed me to be a deep thinking and strategic introvert, a “mastermind” according to this test. But this is a weakness when I “think” through an ongoing situation where I feel something is wrong. Its easy for me to see fault and a solution to most situations. It is quite easy to convince myself after thinking through multiple scenarios and all the various outcomes. Taking what was said and testing it to find what was meant. This is a weakness. I can be right on sometimes in my judgement but its easy to be way off also when I’m directly impacted by a situation that puts me on edge.
I also like things to run smoothly. So it is a constant temptation to fix things (since I can see how things are not right from my fool-proof analysis) and get everyone working correctly again.
Praying helps but I’ve found that God rarely gives you an outright answer. It seems as if at times all you have to work with is what you know and the character that has been instilled in you through the years. Making the wise choice is not always the clearest one and rarely is it the easy one.
I think that praying keeps me from acting on my assumptions often. Even if they are right it may not be my place to bring a situation to light.
My desire is to protect people and keep them from harm. If I’ve experienced things that are harmful then I try to steer others clear of them. I would want a friend to do that to me if I was doing something that was not good for me.
And so I wrestle on. Do I speak up or let things slide? Is it my place or should I just keep praying about it? Am I wrestling for the right reasons? Am I just bitter? Is it worth saying something as simply and carefully as possible if you think it will still cause a larger than average ripple to result? Am I prepared to lose a friend if they are mad with me over this? Do I just keep silent and ignore something that I feel is hurting them? Hurting me?…
Defining the line is the hardest part in confronting a messy situation for me. When is enough enough? Do I just take it over and over? Or do I stand on some self proclaimed “high ground” and speak my mind?
The bottom line is I need to keep praying. Maybe not for an answer or an easy way out but that when the confrontation comes my words, actions, and reactions will all be such that restores and strengthens rather than accuses and rips apart.
Ah, the growing pains of living life. I’d trade little Zion for his teething pains any day!
“Bitterness is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” – Unknown
Filed under: things I'm processing still
Right now there is a 14 month old in the next room who is fussing a little. He is usually well behaved and content to run around and grab things he shouldn’t but at this moment in time the entire world is against him and he is speaking out against it. At times I wonder how his mom can be so patient with him. I’ve seen her looking frazzled after a long day where her son is crankier than normal. But every day it seems that she has enough grace to not smack her son upside the head and tell him to pipe down.
Being an honorary “uncle” to the little guy doesn’t give me a boost of patience with him. At times I sympathize with him more and the nurturing bug bites me and I seem able to handle him better. Sometimes though I just want to stick a pencil down my ear canals and poke out my eardrums!
This annoying yelling and fussing (at times over nothing) that often wakes me up in the mornings is not always fun…but like most things that are not fun I like to look at them from as many perspectives as I can. By changing my perspective I might be able to appreciate or learn from something that I would otherwise not like. This idea works whenever I can slow down and really think about what bothers me and why it does bother me.
Take the bellowing young man who only stops to take another gasp of air. Though this act may be annoying at times he is demonstrating what I do when the game isn’t played by my rules. I am just more “mature” in my approach and subtle in my tactics. Instead of yelling for change I may try a little manipulation or pouting of my own to get the desired outcome I want.
Not to say I always am a brat in this way but I think the blatant attitude of children are often windows into the lives of adults and how they react to being told off.
I’m a Christian and believe in the Bible and the God of the Bible. In Christian circles he is often referred to as the “Father” and that Christians are his “children.” He loves and cares for us as his children and we are to respect and honor him like our father. It is believed that this God created everything and that he is all-powerful and has everything happen for a specific reason.
Watching the 14 month old’s response to anything that happens that he doesn’t like makes me wonder what my response is when my circumstances are not as I’d like them. I may be able to take a more tactful approach and tweak things slightly to try and gain a better position but if my God is all-powerful and knows all then my disguised attempts to change a situation will be easily seen by Him.
Its easy to candy coat things so other people have the idea that everything is alright. My old pastor was able to do that even though he was doing things that shouldn’t be done. I’ve lied countless times to try and cover my tracks. Its not something I’m proud of but it seems easier at times to lie than to just tell the truth.
I know that when I lie it is because I think that if I tell the truth I will be in trouble or I will somehow be thought of differently by people. I don’t think I’ve ever lied just for the sake of lying. It has always been to save my own skin or what I perceived to be my own skin.
If I was being honest I don’t think I fib quite as much as when I was younger. Before I would steal cookies and lie about it…now I just take them! Aging has its advantages! But even if I don’t react outwardly the same way as when I was in grade school does that mean I truly react differently?
The attitude I have or the grudge I hold reveal my true heart. The tension I cause may be an effective measuring tool of how off kilter I am. Do I bring more to the table or do I take from the table?
If I am a good Christian then I would believe that God’s opinion is the one that matters the most. If a guy wants to be a good boyfriend he would value the opinion of his girlfriend more than other girls. In the same way if I profess to love God then I should put his opinion above everyone else’s. That doesn’t mean I shun all the other opinions out there but rather that after I’ve heard all the various views on an item I should make sure that I know what God’s opinion on that would be also. If I really took his opinion seriously and valued it above others then I probably wouldn’t have made as many friends in high school but I also wouldn’t have gotten into as much trouble as I did.
Trying to please others is a real time waster.
Most of the problems I caused in my life were the result of me not taking the time to find out what God’s opinion was. And at times I did know His opinion, not placing the proper value on it was even worse than not knowing at all!
Wanting my own thing I would go ahead and do it. Thinking I knew what was best at that moment. Then I would fall down and bonk my head and fuss about it. “Why did this happen to me?” would be the common refrain throughout my teenage years (and occasionally now).
I’m amazed at how a mom can care for a 14 month old who is fussy and pushes the envelope often. Its even more amazing how whiny and rebellious I have been when I “knew” better and still havn’t been abandoned.
Filed under: things I'm processing still
I’m an American.
I come from what would probably be considered a middle class American family and have been brought up in a home where values were, well, valued. Many lessons on how to be polite, treat others respectfully, work hard, and others filled my childhood and teenage years. I remember many of the corrections received and can see where I’ve come and how things that didn’t make sense when I was 15 now fit together and are clearly understood.
As a child I had ideas of what I wanted to do. Maybe not an actual occupation but I wanted to do something different than what I perceived was normal. I think most kids are this way. Running around the backyard with a toy rifle with an entire army of bandits and hooligans as ferocious as my young imagination could come up with. I was always the one that came through, that fired the shot that was the tipping point, I not only competed and fought but I made an impact on the “outcome” even though the outcome had been the same one of countless other imaginary excursions.
Most folks I think want to leave an impression, or a legacy, on generations to come. They want to be remembered for some great accomplishment, setting a record, writing a chart topping book, be famous in some way, be able to Google their own name and find glowing reports of their life’s accomplishments. I think there are very few people who once they reach adulthood believe that they can really have that much of an impact. Reality, at least as they see it, has set in. They realize they are not going to design the next world’s tallest building or write a song that is loved for decades. For most people the impression they envisioned fades with the unfulfilling pursuit of an “American” dream. The way things were envisioned in childhood have met a much more realistic world for the vast majority of the human race. Years pass and many folks find themselves in a rut that is boring or in a job that doesn’t bring satisfaction but are unable to change their circumstances because of obligations they have picked up along the way.
Escape becomes a dream in itself, transforming the dream of making an impact into a dream of just surviving until retirement. The stress that school, a job, family, friends, house and car payments, credit card debt, cell phones and a host of other things bring narrows one’s vision. Making life feel more like a tight-wire walk while juggling chainsaws where one wrong move will cause some severe problems.
Not to say that life isn’t enjoyable even in these circumstances. Circumstances don’t dictate quality of life nor do material things. Things like quality of life and joy are in ways related but the first doesn’t have any effect on the later.
Joy is not a product of anything. But that isn’t where I’m going today.
Since moving to Nepal I’ve been struck over and over by things that I thought I knew already. I know I’ve considered how this or that matters and its applications to my life but the perspective that comes after a few months on the other side of the world makes old things seem fresh. Its like experiencing these concepts for the first time.
One of those things would be the idea that at any point in one’s life that person can make a difference. Now that difference may not be ground-breaking, it could be, but most likely the ripples caused by an action are not tsunami sized. This may still be discouraging to some. Just living and doing what you are supposed to do is making an impact. This can still be frustrating to that person looking to make a big splash and have a story to tell.
To give up on trying to make an impact because there isn’t a huge outcome on the first hundred tries doesn’t mean the towel should be thrown in. If the drive is lost and motivation leaves and no further attempts to make a difference are made then the only result is that the said person will never do anything productive. I cannot think of anyone who has given up to this point though I have heard the laments of people who want bigger results than they are getting. I’ve been guilty of this myself.
The question I then need to ask myself (though in my tantrum I may not want to ask it) is who decides what is a “big” impact and what isn’t? Nobody has written a book to my knowledge that explains the rules and regulations of where the line is between large and small impacts. It is merely a notion that each person makes in his own mind of what the results, or impact, should look like.
So at some point a chance to cross the ocean comes along and the thought of “Ah-ha! Here is a place that I’m sure I can make a difference!” And within a few months I find myself sitting in my room with similar situations to what one would find in America. A vast array of issues and problems that I really don’t have any control over. The difference here is that I truly don’t have a voice in how things turn out. I don’t have a Congressman or Senator I can write to find out where all the import tax money is going. I’m an outsider wondering where to begin most days. There is more work to be done than I can wrap my head around. Just thinking about how badly the city planners of Kathmandu did in designing the sewage system alone makes my head hurt!
This is in my mind the real issue. When situations come up that expose large concerns or issues most people see it, recognize that it will be a very hard project, and then often look for a smaller and more manageable issue. This is meerly an excuse to avoid possible failure or not being able to see tangible results because the impact of one on a large problem is at times not noticed as much.
I’ve felt as if at several times over the years I have tossed in the towel before I even stepped into the ring. Things I left undone in the States years ago because somebody else could do them might very well be able to be done by someone else…but how am I to know that it will be done? If I can make any difference in any situation why don’t I strive to do that?
The best thing to do is to just start. No one can be blamed for trying to make a difference after all. And since nobody can tell what the next day will bring then any effort to improve anything is a valid undertaking. Don’t be so concerned if your impact is a ripple and not as great as you would like. The journey isn’t about the destination is it? No, the journey is more about what is learned along the way than just the final result. Pay attention to what happens as you step out in faith that you can make a difference and be flexible. Make good choices and seek wise counsel to keep on track. Desire after things that matter and pursue them.
Who knows, the little ripples you cause today may be waves tomorrow. Be faithful and persistent on a smaller daily level and years of larger results will follow.
Filed under: short funny stories
So I made a new friend today and I’m going to brag a little about it because it has been one of the most refreshing evenings I’ve had in months.
His name is Graham and likes dinosaurs as it turns out, which happens to be one of my favorite noises to make. Nothing beats a raptor screech or t-rex snarl! Very few people I’ve met have the ability to make some of the noises that I’ve worked my entire life to perfect. Graham can nail them.
Marianne asked him if he can do an evil laugh and she demonstrated a “bwa-ha-haa” to which Graham looked at her as if she were trying to show him old chewing gum under the table and with a smirk let out one of the most evilly maniacal sounding laughs I’ve ever heard come out of someone. Downright terrifying!
I taught him how to put a candle out with just your fingers and warned him to be careful with this new skill. He had a good time trying to blow out the candles lit at dinner (power outage) and my feeble efforts with Gordon to block his assault on the little flame with our hands.
Apparently he is very strong too he informed us. I raised an eyebrow and asked him if he was as strong as titanium to which he shrugged his shoulders and exclaimed with raised arms “my bones are stronger than titanium!” as if the titanium I was talking about was meerly tin foil! How dare I compare him to such a lousy piece of metal.
Not only that but his skin is poisonous! I don’t know if the medical world has examined this young man yet but he has some sort of skin condition that makes him “highly poisonous” and deadly to the touch. He made sure that I understood how serious this condition was. I assured him that I would be careful around him…no rubbing elbows with Graham if you value your life!!
Somewhere along the line he also discovered that he had super powers. He asked me if I’d like to know his super hero name and informed me with a puffed what it was. Unfortunately I didn’t quite catch it all. It was a very long name which I’m sure reflects his many skills and super hero abilities. It did have the word “blasts” in his title several times though…probably 3 times. Very impressive for one super hero name. Superman? Batman? Try Blast ____ Blast ____ Blastman on for size!
I offered my new-found friend a part of my buffalo momo which he refused. He told me that t-rex’s don’t eat buff momos. They prefer to eat “live” buffalo. So the t-rex with stronger than titanium bones and poisonous skin munched on some flat bread and roared with laughter as I pointed out the other dinosaurs hiding behind the coke cooler across the room. My unskilled eye didn’t see the small t-rex though. It was acting shy and not coming into full view Graham told me. I asked him if it was scared because he was such a ferocious-poisonous-skinned-stronger-than-titanium t-rex. He said “No, he is a flame-tooth t-rex and isn’t scared of me, he just wants to be my friend since we are both t-rex’s.” Aaaah, how foolish of me. 
Graham was non-stop action all night. Telling me of his adventures and even breaking my weak arms with his stronger than titanium arms. I was very impressed with his ability to harness the power of electricity as well. Such a useful skill when it comes to battling bad dudes! His hands raised and his teeth were bared as he “crackled and snapped” as he harnessed the electricity. I asked him if he could use his electricity to power all the light bulbs so we didn’t have to eat by candle-light which must have been a dumb idea as I got no response.
Grahm showed me how to sneak up on other dinosaurs…actually he showed the whole restaurant. That is if they could see him since he was in his sneaking mode. I doubt they sawhim but they may have heard him snarling as he snuck by. I’m now highly trained in how to sneak up on prehistoric beasts! A skill that I’ll use many times here in Nepal!
My friend needed to be caught up on the terrors of Nepal so he would be better informed to combat them. I told him of the Yeti and Abdominal Snowman. I have always thought these creatures to be terrifying but Graham is basically fearless. Nothing can rattle him. I’m very glad to have him as my friend! I’m probably much safer now than I was before I met Graham.
Eventually the time came for us to leave the restaurant and get Graham and his traveling companions back to their hotel. Since they just got in today I figured I would go along in the taxi and help Sarabeth in getting them to their hotel. We were soon out in the streets of Thamel talking to a cab driver.
I was listening to the conversation Sarabeth was having with the driver when I heard Grahm asking one of his two traveling companions a question. I didn’t hear the question but his traveling companion said “I don’t know but you could ask Nate.”
I focused more of my attention on my new friend and he asked a little timidly. “Mr. Nate, can I hold your hand?”
Graham is 4. His parents…er…traveling companions are doing a team building workshop for my team over the next few days. They just flew in today from Thailand.
My advice today is to live life like as if you were a poisonous-skinned t-rex with bones stronger than titanium. It will be one of the greatest days of your life.
Much love,
Nate
Filed under: Uncategorized
So I may have a problem.
I’m not one to eat oranges very often. They are too much work really in my mind to peel them and remove at least some of the stringy pulp that hangs all over the naked orange. Sure they taste pretty good usually and they are full of great vitamins but in my mind all the benefits don’t outweigh the pain it is to prepare an orange for consumption.
So why bother when a banana or apple is so much easier?
Tonight though I have been eating an orange. To be honest Nepali oranges are much more user friendly than American oranges. You would think with the technology advances in America that oranges would be more user friendly but for some reason they are not. The peel on a Nepali orange is fairly easy to remove and can be done with minimal effort. Once the peel is removed it doesn’t take long to rip off the excess pulp and begin to eat. The peels are almost like a loose second skin that is just draped over the fruit. Much easier to prepare.
There are not many times that I will eat an orange. And my reason tonight is fairly simple. My digestive system is off line and I’m doing anything and everything I can think of to get it back on track!
A few days ago I got back from a trek in the Himalayas that left me a little uneasy in my gut. I got sick about 4 days into the trek and came down with a fever and diarrhea. After a night of sweating it out the fever broke but I couldn’t shake the stomach problems and for the next 8 days of trekking I had diarrhea and felt a little off.
Trekking is a great way to lose weight in case any of you were wondering. Trekking with diarrhea is a little more dangerous way to lose weight but VERY effective. I shaved 10-15 pounds off of my already skinny frame and before long looked like a walking skeleton. Since returning my appetite is back with a vengeance and I’m eating quite a bit more than normal. It is probably just my body trying to put some weight back on. Even with my increased appetite my battle with whatever has been causing the diarrhea continues.
So now I find myself trying to add as many additional nutrients as possible throughout the day to try and get my body back to normal and put weight on in as healthy a way as possible. Hence I ate an orange tonight and I’ve been taking multi-vitamins to try and catch my body up on any minerals and vitamins it lost during the trek. Water has been constantly consumed all day and likely will be for several more to come. I want to kick this bug as soon as possible!
Its as if I have an eating disorder as I have been eating so much food! One of the girls who lives in the house was shocked to see me eating an orange and exclaimed, “you must have an eating disorder, you are eating everything you can get your hands on!” This statement isn’t quite true as I have yet to eat the sheets on my bed. But I wonder how easy it would be to eat enough to gain a considerable amount of weight.
I’ve always been skinny. I’d call it a curse and most other would call it a blessing. I really could care less any more but I recall when I was younger and wondering if I would ever break 100 pounds. At 6′2″ I have broken the 100 pound mark but have evened out at a steady 150-155 pounds. A beanstalk of a frame but it suits me well I think.
But the thought did cross my mind several times about weight gain over the last 48 hours. How much would I have to consume to break 200 pounds and maintain that weight? How about 250 or even 300? People in America can hit 300 fairly easily it seems so maybe a better goal would be 500 pounds. I wonder how long it would take, if it is even possible with my metabolism, to gain the extra 350 pounds it would take to reach 500? What sorts of foods I would have to eat every day and how much. I’d probably have to add a few extra meals every day (and night) and have seconds at each meal.
I never watched that movie where the main character ate at a fast food restaurant for 30 days for every meal and messed his body up in the process but I’m sure I’d end up in the same boat.
I don’t mean to offend anyone reading this who may be overweight. I just really do wonder what it would be like to triple in size. I never had a growth spurt growing up. You know, when you are a teenager and consume massive amounts of food and grow 4 inches in a summer. I just steadily ate and steadily grew but always as a scrawny kid.
I guess I’m doomed really. I’m almost in my late 20’s with little sign of my metabolism slowing down any. It may not ever at the rate it is going. Somebody needs to figure out how to pull out some of my “metabolism” so I can sell it to someone who wants to lose weight! I bet I could make quite a bit as I’ve tried all my life unsuccessfully to gain weight. Someone would willingly pay for my metabolism!
Oh well, I better go get a bowl of cereal. The orange is long gone and wasn’t all that great. Its almost bedtime and about time for that last meal of the day. Not dinner, not supper, its the post-dinner-pre-bed meal time! 500 club here I come!
